whorville:

I’m trying to get back to my original weight of 6 pounds and 11 ounces

omg, i have to go to sleep! gone to camp all week. tootles

teamrocketing:

"no i don’t like disney it’s for kids" you need to bibbity bobbity back the fuck up out of my life

ethereal-ineffability:

charmandercheesecake:

odins-one-eyed-fuck:

satansgayson:

2spookysweatermeulin:

chibicrydoll:

cheezetits:

willsuckss:

SHIT I’M LATE FOR AMERICAN SCHOOL

i go to school in america and i can tell u that this is 120% accurate if we dont do this we get sent to freedom jail for not being free enough

In my school, we have to bring our pet eagles to school and whenever we don’t we get a 1 hour detention.

YOU AREN’T WEARING RED WHITE AND BLUE YOU’RE BREAKING DRESS CODE

WOW! You guys are allowed to talk in the international english, i feel so rebelious OH SHIT A TEACHER *cough* Obama gun fried chicken california cowboy kentucky george washington freedom tea boston flag

WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME
no sir, your mom is unconstitutional

we literally have to pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america and to the republic for which it stands one nation under god indivisible with liberty and justice for all every morning

The sad thing is the last part isn’t part of the joke

ethereal-ineffability:

charmandercheesecake:

odins-one-eyed-fuck:

satansgayson:

2spookysweatermeulin:

chibicrydoll:

cheezetits:

willsuckss:

SHIT I’M LATE FOR AMERICAN SCHOOL

i go to school in america and i can tell u that this is 120% accurate if we dont do this we get sent to freedom jail for not being free enough

In my school, we have to bring our pet eagles to school and whenever we don’t we get a 1 hour detention.

YOU AREN’T WEARING RED WHITE AND BLUE YOU’RE BREAKING DRESS CODE

WOW! You guys are allowed to talk in the international english, i feel so rebelious OH SHIT A TEACHER *cough* Obama gun fried chicken california cowboy kentucky george washington freedom tea boston flag

WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME

no sir, your mom is unconstitutional

we literally have to pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america and to the republic for which it stands one nation under god indivisible with liberty and justice for all every morning

The sad thing is the last part isn’t part of the joke

michaxl:

strawberryghostie:

michaxl:

why is everyone in aladdin hot

image

my original statement stands

zacks13incher:

zackisontumblr:

gnarly:

rumor has it that tumblr user zackisontumblr has a 13 incher :o

leave me and my 13 incher alone!

I came out to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now

allhailtherenegades:

"so she’s gay now?"

yeah she turned it all the paperwork last week and her acceptance letter came this morning, it was all pretty sudden

supremewhitegirl:

dendropsyche:

thenimbus:

bonbonbunny:

'What kind of overalls does Mario wear?'

image

Yep, I laughed out loud

I love the “oh no” like he fucking knows he’s going to hear a shitty ass joke

this is the stupidest fucking joke in the world but i laugh every fucking time without fail